HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY
'MURIKAH!
I mentioned in an earlier post that I used to come to you with a weekly schedule regularly and show you all the cool things I planned to do for the summer, the year, or whatever.
I also mentioned that none of these schedules ever worked out. There are plenty of reasons for this, and I'm going to go over five of them with you today. Quite simply those five reasons are as follows:
1. Unclear or imprecise goals
2. Lack of motivation
3. Attempting to do too many things at once
4. Not setting aside time and keeping a schedule
5. Not taking account free time/ socialization/ habits/ etc.
Now I was once the king of making these mistakes, in fact I catch myself on them almost every week I set up a schedule. In this regard for years I thought I was alone. However now every day I see friends, classmates and coworkers struggle with these issues in their lives and never accomplish their goals and eventually come to think that everyone around them is more successful and better than they are regardless of whether or not they make schedules.
Sad bulldog is unaccomplished and sad
And so I'm going to I explain these five issues we all have with scheduling before explaining my scheduling method and leaving you with ten simple tips to completely change your productivity from sad bulldog to superdog in only a couple weeks.
1. Having imprecise or unclear goals
At the end of the day most of us would love to be a Kungfu master, a TV star, a best selling author, or unbelievably rich. And I'm not going to lie, most of us can, either because we have the look or the physique, or even the proper mentality. However without a clear and precise set of goals not a single one of us can do this.
Now in all honesty goal-setting is a complicated issue that not too many people can comprehend without proper explanation. My whole life I have actually had a concrete set of goals just waiting to be checked off in my to-do list at the back of my mind. But for most of forever those goals were not going to ever be accomplished. Why? because of the way I was setting those goals.
Now if a man came up to you in a thick foreign accent and said "in ten years I'm going to be the greatest bodybuilder in history and then a famous movie-star and invest in real-estate before retiring from acting and becoming a politician." You would probably scoff and write off Arnold Schwarzenegger as nothing more than a juiced up crack head.
Now in all honesty goal-setting is a complicated issue that not too many people can comprehend without proper explanation. My whole life I have actually had a concrete set of goals just waiting to be checked off in my to-do list at the back of my mind. But for most of forever those goals were not going to ever be accomplished. Why? because of the way I was setting those goals.
Now if a man came up to you in a thick foreign accent and said "in ten years I'm going to be the greatest bodybuilder in history and then a famous movie-star and invest in real-estate before retiring from acting and becoming a politician." You would probably scoff and write off Arnold Schwarzenegger as nothing more than a juiced up crack head.
Thinking that an immigrant with an accent comparable to a speech impediment could go on to have done as much as he has should inspire us to set our own proper goals in life. Yet here we are today thinking of Arnold as some kind of anomaly brought about by inherited traits and good connections.
So what was his secret?
proper goal setting.
This may seem obvious to you but it actually is something that needs to be spelled out in clearer detail. It is not that you should simply have a set of goals and stick to them, it is that you should have a set of goals and focus on them one or two at a time.
Here's what I mean.
When I was in high school I knew that I wanted to be an Astrophysicist and an Astrobiologist. I wanted to study everything there needed to be known about space travel and I wanted to be at the frontier, not only pushing humanity into an interplanetary society but also to be involved in the discovery of extra-terrestrial life.
Now if this goal was so clear to me, why am I spending so much of my time studying Japanese and Chinese and talking to foriegners instead of working out equations and studying microbiology in a lab?
Because those goals were never precise. You see, having an imprecise set of goals impedes your ability to accomplish something more than not having any goals at all.
Do I still plan to study Astrophysics and Astrobiology? Absolutely. But I am not mentally and financially ready to be a scientist and so I am following a step by step path toward getting to a point where I can have all of my intentions realized.
How? By investing in the long term via short term accomplishments.
To get to a point where you are actually accomplishing your goals you have to think in two separate areas: the reachable today and the doable tomorrow.
If I have a new year's resolution to gain muscle mass, I'm not going to start by setting a goal of gaining one pound per week. What that will do is cause me to lose interest in the goal and eventually skip out on exercise all together. Instead, I'm going to work out for 30 minutes today and set a goal of working out for ten more minutes tomorrow, and by next week increase the reps or the weight, and by the week after that introduce new exercises, until without even caring about my initial broad goal I've found myself gaining more weight than I had expected and feeling more motivated to actually go to the gym.
2. Lack of Motivation
Earlier I mentioned that a lack of motivation can be caused by setting an imprecise goal. This is the majority of the reasons the people I meet are feeling unaccomplished with their current life. I catch myself with this issue quite often, for example I'll say that I'll clean every day of the week... and by Friday there's flies coming out of the kitchen sink and the Grouch is using my toilet as a summer home.
A huge issue with motivation is that we simply don't want to do the things that just suck. I honestly don't want to cook a single one of the meals I cook, or clean my roommates' urine stains off of the toilet bowl. But neither did you, my mum (or dad for that matter) want to change my diapers or listen to me go on and on about my friends in elementary school that you thought were a bad influence on me. Yet these things need to be done in order to live a productive and fulfilled life with a variety of accomplishments.
No one can hold on to motivation forever, and everyone will break after forcing themselves through willpower for too long. But cultivating your motivation increasing techniques will probably change your life more than anything.
3. Trying to do too much at once
This is self-explanatory and yet so many people, myself included, get caught up in the spider's web of overworking, overbooking, overreaching.
As much as you may like, you really can't start learning three languages at the same time while working part time night shifts and starting your own business. At least not in that particular order. Though it is possible to do all of these things, and you can actually make it look like you're doing them at the same time, the truth is that a human can only handle a certain amount of stress for a specific amount of time. Eventually we all crack.
My thing was trying to learn languages, go to work, keep up with my friends on social media, study science in my spare time, and the list went on. What really happened is I would slump into my chair and just text people all day. Having too much to do is just as bad as having nothing to do, because in both scenarios you get nothing done.
4. Not setting aside the time and not keeping a schedule
This is one of the biggest mistakes people make. People have a habit of saying they love, for example, Astronomy. Yet every week they spend their nights tucked away in bed or on amazon buying telescopes they'll never use. Another example is the writer who has been working on a novel for fifteen years but hasn't actually written the first page.
You need to set aside the time for your goals and interests and make them as great a priority as going to work or going on a date. You can't just say you have a hobby; you actually have to take the time to develop that hobby into an aspect of your character.
A question I ask myself is: If I'm on a date and I tell them that I go to the gym every day am I lying to make myself look sexy or am I going to prove myself to be someone who follows through with their convictions?
If I think a hobby is nothing more than a thing I do because I'm bored, then I'm not really impressive, I'm boring, right?
But lets say you're an introvert and you want to become more comfortable in social settings. Being an introvert myself I completely understand that this is one of the most stressful and exhausting experiences we can face. But if you don't hold yourself accountable and actively schedule in a time where you go somewhere just to talk to people, or if you don't set a realistic goal of learning how to excel at small talk you're just going to give up really quickly and retreat back into your shell, a preferable but socially detrimental alternative.
A question I ask myself is: If I'm on a date and I tell them that I go to the gym every day am I lying to make myself look sexy or am I going to prove myself to be someone who follows through with their convictions?
If I think a hobby is nothing more than a thing I do because I'm bored, then I'm not really impressive, I'm boring, right?
But lets say you're an introvert and you want to become more comfortable in social settings. Being an introvert myself I completely understand that this is one of the most stressful and exhausting experiences we can face. But if you don't hold yourself accountable and actively schedule in a time where you go somewhere just to talk to people, or if you don't set a realistic goal of learning how to excel at small talk you're just going to give up really quickly and retreat back into your shell, a preferable but socially detrimental alternative.
Actively setting aside the time to do something is make or break with your motivation, and it will aid you in completing your goals and increasing your confidence. It's not rocket science, and I'll tell you what it still feels like hell, but the reward is more fulfilling than the alternatives.
5. Not taking into account free time
This is something we all do when we say we're going to be productive. We get up and say I'm going to clean my house then go to the gym and then work on my project for the rest of the day then make dinner, and we end up cleaning half our bedroom before spending the rest of the day watching netflix.
This comes down to willpower. Now, a popular hypothesis among psychologists is that willpower is a resource that can be depleted with overuse. i.e. if you force yourself to clean you'll have a difficult time forcing yourself to cook, and after that an even more difficult time trying to study. This is partially correct, or at least it points in the right direction. The reality is that there is a second end to the stick. If it were true that willpower is depleted over time, then we wouldn't actually see the improvement in motivation to do exhaustive tasks over time that we actually see in people. Now we could talk this up to the habit loop, where if you do something enough times you'll simply do it automatically after a certain amount of time.
But it is more than just habit. There is a reason the work at your new job becomes easier on day two, and then by three weeks most of us are in tune with what we need to do. This is because we actively engage our minds into, for whatever reason, performing on a certain level that will become our standard for our tenure at a job. This means that I am willing to argue that a new employee that seems like they might have a lackadaisical personality from day one, is more likely to quit than someone who just does what they're supposed to do. But I will not say that a person who goes above and beyond what they're supposed to do is going to be your star employee in three months. Why? Because there is some truth to the depletion model of willpower.
In this situation, let's say a guy named Marty has just applied for a new job. He's excited and ready to make some money and he wants to impress his new bosses. Marty ends up doing really well on his first week, he works super hard and was even willing to do other people's jobs for them.
But it is more than just habit. There is a reason the work at your new job becomes easier on day two, and then by three weeks most of us are in tune with what we need to do. This is because we actively engage our minds into, for whatever reason, performing on a certain level that will become our standard for our tenure at a job. This means that I am willing to argue that a new employee that seems like they might have a lackadaisical personality from day one, is more likely to quit than someone who just does what they're supposed to do. But I will not say that a person who goes above and beyond what they're supposed to do is going to be your star employee in three months. Why? Because there is some truth to the depletion model of willpower.
In this situation, let's say a guy named Marty has just applied for a new job. He's excited and ready to make some money and he wants to impress his new bosses. Marty ends up doing really well on his first week, he works super hard and was even willing to do other people's jobs for them.
His coworkers soon realized this and began assigning Marty their tasks, and Marty, being brand new and wanting to make friends, exhausts himself to make everyone happy.
Marty quits his job after three weeks.
Why? Because he has completely depleted his willpower to accomplish his job by doing everyone else's jobs as well.
But had Marty started small and just did what he was assigned by his boss for the first three weeks, and then gotten the hang of everything, he maybe would have made real friends who weren't interested in having him do their work for him. He'd go home and have the energy to play the piano, or go out for a nice long walk before going back to work and feeling refreshed and excited. He'd eventually get to the point where his willpower was enough that he could take on more tasks, like a manager's job. And before he knew it, he could become head of the store and be in charge of three hundred people and over a million dollars worth of goods and sales.
Marty quits his job after three weeks.
Why? Because he has completely depleted his willpower to accomplish his job by doing everyone else's jobs as well.
But had Marty started small and just did what he was assigned by his boss for the first three weeks, and then gotten the hang of everything, he maybe would have made real friends who weren't interested in having him do their work for him. He'd go home and have the energy to play the piano, or go out for a nice long walk before going back to work and feeling refreshed and excited. He'd eventually get to the point where his willpower was enough that he could take on more tasks, like a manager's job. And before he knew it, he could become head of the store and be in charge of three hundred people and over a million dollars worth of goods and sales.
What I'm getting at here is that if you overuse your willpower in a short period of time it becomes a limited resource. I ran into Marty's problem while I worked at Wal-Mart. I wanted so badly to continue my education into math and science, but because I am dyslexic mathematics is an extremely taxing activity for me. So because I overworked myself on the job, I had no energy left to do what I planned to do when I got out, and thus never worked hard on a single math problem or even practiced. I spent my days waiting to see the person I was dating at the time, drinking, and binge watching netflix.
Now, I'm going to bring up some brain gains again. Because a newer hypothesis suggests that willpower acts more like a muscle than a reserve.
Now, I'm going to bring up some brain gains again. Because a newer hypothesis suggests that willpower acts more like a muscle than a reserve.
What actually happens is that you can see the results almost the day after you preform an exhaustive task.
Say you make a list of five things you want to get done today
1. Call my kids
2. Write for an hour
3. Practice the violin
4. Do the laundry
Now on this list we can see two things: exhaustive tasks, and fulfilling tasks. Unfortunately all of these are both exhausting and fulfilling. Yes you want to talk to your kids but they're stressed too or maybe you don't get along too well with your daughter because her boyfriend is a real jackass, or maybe you can't stop screeching the strings on the violin. Doing the laundry is a complete pain in the ass and you just want to die while you do it, and let me tell you, writing is no walk in the park.
But you can do all of these things by the end of the day, No sweat, by making it fun and focusing on doing what you want to do.
How?
Well your willpower to do something is going to be depleted when you do exhaustive work without getting your energy booster, let's say it's netflix.
But you can do all of these things by the end of the day, No sweat, by making it fun and focusing on doing what you want to do.
How?
Well your willpower to do something is going to be depleted when you do exhaustive work without getting your energy booster, let's say it's netflix.
If you look at this list, there is a task on it that you can do at the same time you gain your energy boost: laundry. Just take your phone and bring it to the laundromat and watch your shows while you do your laundry. You're getting a crappy goal done and doing what you enjoy while you're at it.
But there's a catch: too much fun.
If you start doing your laundry first thing, and watch netflix at the same time, you'll watch Orange is the New Black for the rest of the day, who cares about your kids, you won't spend a second writing... and the violin will just have to collect more dust. But hey you did your laundry, right?
This is why you have to pay considerable amount of attention to when and how you do the things you enjoy that aren't productive. It's like Leg day at the gym, you start with Deadlifts and Squats, and then move on to the smaller easier muscle groups like calves, quads and hamstrings. This way you won't be too exhausted to deadlift that 250lbs.
People constantly plan to do things and simply end up not paying attention to how much time is wasted by doing what they enjoy before doing what needs to be done. Had you called your kids while doing your laundry after doing all of the exhaustive tasks and spent the rest of the night watching netflix, you'd feel satisfied and accomplished once the day is over.
Let me show you:
Here is my schedule for this week
If you start doing your laundry first thing, and watch netflix at the same time, you'll watch Orange is the New Black for the rest of the day, who cares about your kids, you won't spend a second writing... and the violin will just have to collect more dust. But hey you did your laundry, right?
This is why you have to pay considerable amount of attention to when and how you do the things you enjoy that aren't productive. It's like Leg day at the gym, you start with Deadlifts and Squats, and then move on to the smaller easier muscle groups like calves, quads and hamstrings. This way you won't be too exhausted to deadlift that 250lbs.
People constantly plan to do things and simply end up not paying attention to how much time is wasted by doing what they enjoy before doing what needs to be done. Had you called your kids while doing your laundry after doing all of the exhaustive tasks and spent the rest of the night watching netflix, you'd feel satisfied and accomplished once the day is over.
Part 2: What actually matters to you?
Speaking of Doing the exhaustive tasks first, let me introduce you to my own method for making a schedule. My method was borrowed from the Big Rocks method that shows up periodically online but doesn't really ever reach people the way it should.
It's an extremely comprehensible idea. All you have to do is decide what it is that matters most to you and then schedule that in before you plan out your week.
Let me show you:
Here is my schedule for this week
Now I'm intentionally showing you an incomplete schedule here, generally I try to fill in every minute so that I always have something to do.
Now, what I'm doing here is layering my schedule, I take the first day of the week (in this case I was "too busy" on Sunday so I started Monday) and I set aside a time in my "to do" color (green), titled "getting situated". Now during that time I start by making a list for this week:
Now, what I'm doing here is layering my schedule, I take the first day of the week (in this case I was "too busy" on Sunday so I started Monday) and I set aside a time in my "to do" color (green), titled "getting situated". Now during that time I start by making a list for this week:
Big rocks:
Japanese
Writing
Work
Exercise
Reading
My Big Rocks almost never change, but essentially they are the things I decide that I should do, and do no matter what. So that means if you call me during that time, I will not answer your call, if you try to schedule to meet me for that time, I will decline and ask for a rescheduling.
To me your big rocks can be one of two things: What defines your character, and your profession.
I consider myself a writer and a bartender, which is why writing and work appear in the same color, the work color. So, for anything in blue, there is no exception, if it is on the schedule I have no choice but to do it or else I won't get to eat.
But for my personal character I would consider myself a polyglot, an avid reader, and an amateur, non-competing bodybuilder. So I added exercise to each day (some days are after midnight) that the gym is open, I also add more than an hour's worth of studying, and some time reading as well. Each are color coded, orange for physical health, bright blue for studying, and gray for hobbies.
I then make a second list
Sand:
Instant messaging
youtube
pornography
drinking
videogames
facebook
This list is composed of my distractions: the things I want to minimize in my life, or at the very least do only when I have finished another task that is important to me. The last thing I want to do is wake up and grab my phone instead of my book, so I make this list to say okay I want to make sure I try to avoid these things as much as possible. I know I'm going to turn to some if not all of them by the end of the week, but I want it in the back of my head as a time-waster alert system.
And then, every day I make a third list
Pebbles:
Chinese
Korean
cleaning
improving social skills
dancing
getting an oil change
Practicing my flying trident
Astronomy
These are the things I don't have to do right now, but maybe would like to or should get done, they're also my hobbies or interests that I want to keep up, but don't feel bad about not working on every day.
Why is Chinese in this list? Because I speak Chinese every day, and actually am okay with not having a focused study session as I would with Japanese.
These would all be color coded as well, Dancing would be in orange or red depending on whether or not I'm meeting a friend, Astronomy would be in gray, cleaning in green etc.
I've found that color coding is an excellent way for me to prioritize my events and remind myself how much I actually care about something.
For example, If I put something in red it means I have to go to meet someone, but it also implies that I get to go, want to go, or that I benefit in some way from going. However, if I label it in yellow, it means I agreed to go, but really don't want to meet that person, or do that thing. In other words, its a "promise" that I'm willing to choose not to keep. This may sound cold, but it is a wholly reassuring strategy for managing priorities, and dealing with introversion. If I can honestly say to myself that "maybe spending the time doing that is not something I want to do", then I can keep my mind focused on what it is I actually want/should be concentrating on.
Another thing I do, especially during the semester, is a morning and evening routine.
Now, during the school semesters my days are pretty much overbooked. In fact, this is what my schedule looked like in march this year:
My color coding has changed since March, but you get the point. I generally am so busy during the semester that the moment I finish eating my last meal of the day I would just straight to bed and call it a night.
So what good is a morning and evening routine?
Well you can't see it here, but I was cooking almost every meal listed on here before getting to campus. My day was starting out blocked off in an order. I'd wake up, make breakfast and lunch, go to campus, write, study, and then do homework. All before my first class.
It was automatic for me, I just got up and did it habitually even while making different two or three meals at the same time.
And at night I just cooked, ate, and was in bed by 9:00.
I felt that so long as those aspects of my day were in order the rest of the day would pan out perfectly.
This rarely happened, but I was consistently satisfied.
But there can be drawbacks
An issue I always had when I first started this scheduling thing was being upset when the world outside messed up my schedule. And this is something to watch out for, because it means that you are actually causing your own stress. It is not your girlfriend's fault that she needs to go grocery shopping while you have your studying scheduled. It's your fault for not taking into account what she needs to do as well.(In the situations where you are going to be living with someone I suggest making schedules together or linking calendars online so that you can make plans that coincide with your lives.)
You may look at my schedule and think "hell I am not doing that, I have a life!"
That's great and all, and I know this looks boring and exhausting but I have a life too buddy. If you look closely I had an ace up my sleeve, "free time" blocks. These were essential to me. I also scheduled my days so that every Friday after a certain time my "day off" began until Saturday and literally no work would get done at all until Sunday. I used this to combat upsetting someone who needed my time.
Now, It looks like I was so busy on paper but in reality this was a breeze of a semester.
In fact I only feel overworked when I'm not doing this. It's good to remember that stress pops up when you don't have a plan, and when you spend a lot of your time avoiding stress by putting things off and choosing not to make plans you only end up maximizing your stress when a due date arrives.
So what else can we do?
Well I have just ten more things to say to you. Below are ten tips that will make you more productive than me, I promise. And yes, though this is directed towards you mum, this is quite student oriented so bear with me.
Reading
My Big Rocks almost never change, but essentially they are the things I decide that I should do, and do no matter what. So that means if you call me during that time, I will not answer your call, if you try to schedule to meet me for that time, I will decline and ask for a rescheduling.
To me your big rocks can be one of two things: What defines your character, and your profession.
I consider myself a writer and a bartender, which is why writing and work appear in the same color, the work color. So, for anything in blue, there is no exception, if it is on the schedule I have no choice but to do it or else I won't get to eat.
But for my personal character I would consider myself a polyglot, an avid reader, and an amateur, non-competing bodybuilder. So I added exercise to each day (some days are after midnight) that the gym is open, I also add more than an hour's worth of studying, and some time reading as well. Each are color coded, orange for physical health, bright blue for studying, and gray for hobbies.
I then make a second list
Sand:
Instant messaging
youtube
pornography
drinking
videogames
This list is composed of my distractions: the things I want to minimize in my life, or at the very least do only when I have finished another task that is important to me. The last thing I want to do is wake up and grab my phone instead of my book, so I make this list to say okay I want to make sure I try to avoid these things as much as possible. I know I'm going to turn to some if not all of them by the end of the week, but I want it in the back of my head as a time-waster alert system.
And then, every day I make a third list
Pebbles:
Chinese
Korean
cleaning
improving social skills
dancing
getting an oil change
Practicing my flying trident
Astronomy
These are the things I don't have to do right now, but maybe would like to or should get done, they're also my hobbies or interests that I want to keep up, but don't feel bad about not working on every day.
Why is Chinese in this list? Because I speak Chinese every day, and actually am okay with not having a focused study session as I would with Japanese.
These would all be color coded as well, Dancing would be in orange or red depending on whether or not I'm meeting a friend, Astronomy would be in gray, cleaning in green etc.
I've found that color coding is an excellent way for me to prioritize my events and remind myself how much I actually care about something.
For example, If I put something in red it means I have to go to meet someone, but it also implies that I get to go, want to go, or that I benefit in some way from going. However, if I label it in yellow, it means I agreed to go, but really don't want to meet that person, or do that thing. In other words, its a "promise" that I'm willing to choose not to keep. This may sound cold, but it is a wholly reassuring strategy for managing priorities, and dealing with introversion. If I can honestly say to myself that "maybe spending the time doing that is not something I want to do", then I can keep my mind focused on what it is I actually want/should be concentrating on.
Another thing I do, especially during the semester, is a morning and evening routine.
Now, during the school semesters my days are pretty much overbooked. In fact, this is what my schedule looked like in march this year:
My color coding has changed since March, but you get the point. I generally am so busy during the semester that the moment I finish eating my last meal of the day I would just straight to bed and call it a night.
So what good is a morning and evening routine?
Well you can't see it here, but I was cooking almost every meal listed on here before getting to campus. My day was starting out blocked off in an order. I'd wake up, make breakfast and lunch, go to campus, write, study, and then do homework. All before my first class.
It was automatic for me, I just got up and did it habitually even while making different two or three meals at the same time.
And at night I just cooked, ate, and was in bed by 9:00.
I felt that so long as those aspects of my day were in order the rest of the day would pan out perfectly.
This rarely happened, but I was consistently satisfied.
But there can be drawbacks
An issue I always had when I first started this scheduling thing was being upset when the world outside messed up my schedule. And this is something to watch out for, because it means that you are actually causing your own stress. It is not your girlfriend's fault that she needs to go grocery shopping while you have your studying scheduled. It's your fault for not taking into account what she needs to do as well.(In the situations where you are going to be living with someone I suggest making schedules together or linking calendars online so that you can make plans that coincide with your lives.)
You may look at my schedule and think "hell I am not doing that, I have a life!"
That's great and all, and I know this looks boring and exhausting but I have a life too buddy. If you look closely I had an ace up my sleeve, "free time" blocks. These were essential to me. I also scheduled my days so that every Friday after a certain time my "day off" began until Saturday and literally no work would get done at all until Sunday. I used this to combat upsetting someone who needed my time.
Now, It looks like I was so busy on paper but in reality this was a breeze of a semester.
In fact I only feel overworked when I'm not doing this. It's good to remember that stress pops up when you don't have a plan, and when you spend a lot of your time avoiding stress by putting things off and choosing not to make plans you only end up maximizing your stress when a due date arrives.
So what else can we do?
Well I have just ten more things to say to you. Below are ten tips that will make you more productive than me, I promise. And yes, though this is directed towards you mum, this is quite student oriented so bear with me.
10. Use technology to its advantages.
They're constantly updating it too. Essentially the point is to do the things on your to do list so you can gain experience points and gold or deal boss damage during a quest. You can then buy items that make you stronger over time, which acts as a sort of reward.
Your avatar is fully customizable and you can even make it wear a costume that looks cool over maxed out gear that isn't aesthetically pleasing enough.
cue:
I feel tired
And on top of that, you will provide an avenue for your children and grandchildren to learn who you are, and even open up a road into your past when your children reach a certain age that will help you connect with them better.
You see, your issue was starting wayyy too big. Though you may want to change EVERYTHING in your life, you are still human, and like it or not, humans hate change. "If change is necessary, make it feel like a gentle improvement on the past." You will fight yourself and lose if you try to change too much at once.
As it turns out, the best way to introduce a change in your life when everything is completely out of order is actually something you might not expect.
Start by cleaning your room.
Seriously. If you can muster up the willpower to clean your entire room today, you can have a clean space for tomorrow. There will be no distractions, there will be nothing in your way.
And then tomorrow make a to do list for that day, or a schedule. Make sure you're doing what you need to do, and don't overreach, maybe walk for five minutes instead of going all out and running three miles.
As you can see I use my google accounts to pretty much schedule my entire life. But there are plenty of apps and programs that can help you as well.
A personal favorite of mine was Habitica
A personal favorite of mine was Habitica
This free website/ app gives you an avatar and lets you turn your own life into a Roll Playing Game. I love RPG's and I've always found it fascinating how lifelike they can be.
In an RPG you gain skills by investing time and money, just like with life. Habitica actually satisfied my hopes for doing this with its simple interface and task-based management system.
They're constantly updating it too. Essentially the point is to do the things on your to do list so you can gain experience points and gold or deal boss damage during a quest. You can then buy items that make you stronger over time, which acts as a sort of reward.
Your avatar is fully customizable and you can even make it wear a costume that looks cool over maxed out gear that isn't aesthetically pleasing enough.
I loved this site and it really helped me a lot throughout the years, what I did while using it was create multiple accounts and joined them into one single party. I then specialized the accounts into aspects of my character, so I had a warrior class be for bodybuilding, a healer for social and spiritual health, several wizards for learning the things I was studying at the time (math, Chinese, Astronomy, etc) and a rogue for monetary gains and for work- related things.
This actually worked very well for me for quite some time. But the system has some drawbacks.
1. In-game money is too easy to make
1. In-game money is too easy to make
2. I spent more time developing my character than myself
3. There is no in game way to hold yourself accountable for cheating
4. There are no skill trees you can create to measure your progress (which is why I created multiple accounts)
5. It is entirely focused on your to-do's and not useful for scheduling
6. It's way too easy to level up after level 10
However these drawbacks do not outweigh the potential benefits of the program. If you want to stay productive over the summer breaks I suggest a program like this.
There are also a large list of apps that block distracting websites, or that shut down everything on your computer but your word processor.
There are also a large list of apps that block distracting websites, or that shut down everything on your computer but your word processor.
Let me say this:
If there's anything I want my readers to learn from reading here, it is that technology is not an enemy of productivity, and that so long as you use it right, technology is one of your greatest aids. I suggest you do some research and find what kind of sites/apps work for you. I've found that after a certain amount of time I no longer need these services anymore because the actions are automatic. Which leads me to the next one:
9. Use habit formation as a brain hacking tool
We've all gotten up every day and put our shoes on before going to work, or class.
But have you ever stopped to notice what foot you put in first? I'm willing to bet that you put the same foot in first every time without noticing.
Do you instantly reach for your phone when you are alone, or when someone stops talking for a certain amount of time?
But have you ever stopped to notice what foot you put in first? I'm willing to bet that you put the same foot in first every time without noticing.
Do you instantly reach for your phone when you are alone, or when someone stops talking for a certain amount of time?
Habit formation is an amazing thing. Generally we don't even recognize that we form a habit until we have to change the way we do something.
If you consciously choose not to grab your phone when you know you just got a text, or when it gets quiet, how do you feel? You feel uncomfortable, right? It is an awkward gut turning feeling. Your mind says don't do the thing but your subconscious says do it.
If you consciously choose not to grab your phone when you know you just got a text, or when it gets quiet, how do you feel? You feel uncomfortable, right? It is an awkward gut turning feeling. Your mind says don't do the thing but your subconscious says do it.
Okay I just couldn't resist the Palpatine reference.
There's a book on habit formation that you might like to read called the The Power of Habit which will explain to you in detail how to form a habit, how long it will take you, and even how to break bad habits.
The author breaks habits down into three steps: the cue, the routine, and the reward. Now this may not make much sense when it comes to putting on your shoes, but lets take the example of coffee.
cue:
I feel tired
routine:
I get some coffee
reward:
reward:
I feel jittery and energized
And once this process, the habit loop, is repeated enough times it will become a habit. This also suggests that there is a hacking mechanism.
Essentially so long as there is a cue, routine and a reward, a habit (good or bad) can form.
So if you want to exercise more, but hate exercising, set up a cue (maybe an alarm, etc.) go through the routine of exercising, and then reward yourself, maybe by eating a burrito from chipotle or even having a bar of chocolate. Now down the road, the exercise itself may become both the routine and the reward (in the book it's called "craving" which helps you keep a habit), but if you don't have a proper cue and a good enough reward at the start you may not actually form a habit.
Essentially so long as there is a cue, routine and a reward, a habit (good or bad) can form.
So if you want to exercise more, but hate exercising, set up a cue (maybe an alarm, etc.) go through the routine of exercising, and then reward yourself, maybe by eating a burrito from chipotle or even having a bar of chocolate. Now down the road, the exercise itself may become both the routine and the reward (in the book it's called "craving" which helps you keep a habit), but if you don't have a proper cue and a good enough reward at the start you may not actually form a habit.
Here's a video by Thomas Frank discussing five lessons from this book better than I ever could.
If you're s student struggling with your grades like I do
I suggest binge watching this guy the next time you want to
watch netflix.
8. Do not forget about your free time
I mentioned this before but it is vitally important to make sure that you take into account your free time. If you're like me and get unnecessarily busy, you are going to want to actually schedule in free time. I heard in a TED talk once that the straight A students generally schedule in what they'll do when they aren't studying before they schedule in their studying times. That way they look at their schedule and think "Wow look at all the things I get to do!" instead of looking at it and thinking "ugh look at all the shit I have to do.."
Your free time is your crutch and you cannot ignore it; be honest with yourself and don't feel bad about putting "Drinking with friends" on your schedule.
This is how people in Fraternities and Sororities tend to maintain higher GPA's than their counterpart students. They have scheduled events where they go drinking that they have to plan and monetize and cannot miss if they want to stay in the group. They generally look at these events and think "Oh I get to see my little become a member!" or "Oh I'm going to get so drunk tonight!"
This is how people in Fraternities and Sororities tend to maintain higher GPA's than their counterpart students. They have scheduled events where they go drinking that they have to plan and monetize and cannot miss if they want to stay in the group. They generally look at these events and think "Oh I get to see my little become a member!" or "Oh I'm going to get so drunk tonight!"
Yes it may seem dooming, but I've seen your exam grades you're getting ten to twenty points higher than me, so I know that it's working.
Just, always remember to have your cake and eat it too. It's okay to get crunk with friends, it's okay to have an entire day where you don't do any work related things, your brain needs it to recover from all your hard work! So have some fun!
Just, always remember to have your cake and eat it too. It's okay to get crunk with friends, it's okay to have an entire day where you don't do any work related things, your brain needs it to recover from all your hard work! So have some fun!
7. Read
Okay I talk about reading a lot more than I should, and most of what I recommend and link to has something to do with reading, but there is nothing that makes you prioritize your time like reading. Say you're bored out of your mind by reading and so always turn to movies and TV.
Well you should be reading instead of watching TV because if you can build up the willpower to do something that bores you then you can build up the willpower to do something that inspires you.
If you want to schedule your time, feel productive, feel accomplished, get out there and read, Rambo.
Well you should be reading instead of watching TV because if you can build up the willpower to do something that bores you then you can build up the willpower to do something that inspires you.
If you want to schedule your time, feel productive, feel accomplished, get out there and read, Rambo.
6. Start a Journal
Now mum, I know you'll agree with me on this, but another reader might be thinking "A journal? Really?" And I'm not going to lie, it's kind of an odd thing to recommend.
So why am I recommending it, even knowing that I have trouble keeping one? Well, it's a huge exerciser of willpower to keep a journal, but a surprising side-affect of journal writing is that it can cause Keystone Habits to form. Now if you watched the video above, you'll see that he mentioned these. Essentially a Keystone Habit is a habit that branches off from another good habit. If you spend time writing down how you felt today or what you did, you'll see patterns in your life that had previously gone unnoticed. You'd be surprised how many doughnuts you might eat in a day, or how much you complain about other people. You might find so many aspects of your life that you might want to change and all you have to do is accept that, and make a good plan to over come these drawbacks of your personality.
And on top of that, you will provide an avenue for your children and grandchildren to learn who you are, and even open up a road into your past when your children reach a certain age that will help you connect with them better.
I've heard so many times "I was a different person back then" But do you actually remember what it felt like to be 18 or 25? The difference in maturity between just 18 and 19 can be astonishing. I can say to you right now, last year I was literally a different person in almost every way, do I want to forget that change? Do I want to look at my own children (when I have them) and feel disconnected from them because I can't remember what it was like to be their age?
No I don't, and neither do you. Keep a journal and it'll really help. (I'm saying this to myself too because I've started like 15 since I was a preteen and only two of them lasted more than a year...)
No I don't, and neither do you. Keep a journal and it'll really help. (I'm saying this to myself too because I've started like 15 since I was a preteen and only two of them lasted more than a year...)
5. Make clear BIG goals
Having goals is a great thing. It defines the content of your character, your future. Your goals provide an avenue for you and other people to gauge what you like, who you will date, where you'll be in the future.
And yet so few of us actually make our goals.
There are a lot of people, billions of people, on this planet. Many dream of becoming doctors, soldiers, kings, pilots, firemen, astronauts, celebrities, and the list goes on. But only a select few make it. Significantly less than Half of us will accomplish our goals. ( DISCLAIMER: I did not do the math, this just sounded ominous enough) Do you want to be in that group that sits on the couch all day and lives a life in a dream-like state of waiting for the opportunity for something to happen?
There are a lot of people, billions of people, on this planet. Many dream of becoming doctors, soldiers, kings, pilots, firemen, astronauts, celebrities, and the list goes on. But only a select few make it. Significantly less than Half of us will accomplish our goals. ( DISCLAIMER: I did not do the math, this just sounded ominous enough) Do you want to be in that group that sits on the couch all day and lives a life in a dream-like state of waiting for the opportunity for something to happen?
No, you don't.
But working on your goals is exceptionally difficult to do. It doesn't just happen in a day and if you do not have clear and precise goals it won't happen at all.
I suggest making a simple BIG goal, say you want to be one of the most famous singer/songwriters.
That's not easy, in fact it's terrifying.
But you know this kid?
But you know this kid?
Yeah I'm not a big fan, but he's made some good hits lately
Do you know he started on youtube singing the songs he liked? He wanted to be one of the most famous singers and he advertised his voice and became one.
So how can you do that? Well, don't just say "in ten years I'm going to be famous".
So how can you do that? Well, don't just say "in ten years I'm going to be famous".
Say "I want to be Famous"
And then make a step by step plan from top to bottom:
And then make a step by step plan from top to bottom:
In five years I'm going to have an album out.
In three weeks I'm going to start putting my voice out on social media websites
I'm going to promote this until I get 100 views, 200 views, 1000 views 10000 views
Make a goal that is clear and precise, and so long as you act on that goal the rest will follow.
Make a goal that is clear and precise, and so long as you act on that goal the rest will follow.
4. Take into account other people's behaviors
While reading this you're already on your way to becoming the most productive person on the planet. But what about your needy boyfriend? Or your dog? Or your kids?
Now mum, one thing I love the most about you is that you have the ability to drop everything for us. I could never do that for most of the people I know and I'm afraid that when I have my own kids, this inability to be there for someone may leech out. I want to work hard to be like you when it comes to this aspect of your personality. And I could never be thankful enough for this.
Now mum, one thing I love the most about you is that you have the ability to drop everything for us. I could never do that for most of the people I know and I'm afraid that when I have my own kids, this inability to be there for someone may leech out. I want to work hard to be like you when it comes to this aspect of your personality. And I could never be thankful enough for this.
Why am I saying that? Maybe because I'm in my 20's and it's time to focus on me and becoming the man-person I'm supposed to be, but in reality I do not pay enough attention to other people's feelings and needs. It's not actually a bad thing, but it does cause extra stress and can strain relationships.
If you do not account for what your friends or your spouse, or your roommates are doing you may not be able to continue that relationship or you might end up having to kill your schedule to make up for it. Yes you have to be cold, yes you have to be unyielding, but if your personality demands human interaction then you need to be able to allow yourself their time.
Be okay with dropping what you're doing for the person you love. Be like my mum.
If you do not account for what your friends or your spouse, or your roommates are doing you may not be able to continue that relationship or you might end up having to kill your schedule to make up for it. Yes you have to be cold, yes you have to be unyielding, but if your personality demands human interaction then you need to be able to allow yourself their time.
Be okay with dropping what you're doing for the person you love. Be like my mum.
3. Actually make a schedule or a to-do list regularly
Some people do schedules, some people do to-do lists, some people do both. I had a teacher in high school that wrote a to-do list every day and prioritized what he needed to do now and pushed off what he didn't need to do. I saw how long it took him to grade papers and decided that to-do lists might not be for me.
I make a weekly schedule which generally tends to work for mapping out my day.
Here are a couple videos you can watch that might give you some good ideas. They're kind of long so feel free to come back to them when you have the time.
Here are a couple videos you can watch that might give you some good ideas. They're kind of long so feel free to come back to them when you have the time.
Yeah There's a lot of love for Ben Franklin when it comes to making schedules.
His schedule system was actually quite well thought out and is worth taking a look at.
His schedule system was actually quite well thought out and is worth taking a look at.
2. Always remember to start small
Earlier I mentioned setting up a clear and concise goal and then making a list of goals that compound downward in their intensity into the present.
Say you feel like your entire life is a mess. You can't get anything done and you just feel like crap all the time.
And you've finally had enough, you say you're going to make some big changes and you're going to be super awesome and win at everything.
Well you get up, and spend five hours making a schedule, you get exhausted and then by the next day you start your new thing annnnd the motivation is gone.
Say you feel like your entire life is a mess. You can't get anything done and you just feel like crap all the time.
And you've finally had enough, you say you're going to make some big changes and you're going to be super awesome and win at everything.
Well you get up, and spend five hours making a schedule, you get exhausted and then by the next day you start your new thing annnnd the motivation is gone.
You see, your issue was starting wayyy too big. Though you may want to change EVERYTHING in your life, you are still human, and like it or not, humans hate change. "If change is necessary, make it feel like a gentle improvement on the past." You will fight yourself and lose if you try to change too much at once.
As it turns out, the best way to introduce a change in your life when everything is completely out of order is actually something you might not expect.
Start by cleaning your room.
Seriously. If you can muster up the willpower to clean your entire room today, you can have a clean space for tomorrow. There will be no distractions, there will be nothing in your way.
And then tomorrow make a to do list for that day, or a schedule. Make sure you're doing what you need to do, and don't overreach, maybe walk for five minutes instead of going all out and running three miles.
You need to take baby steps to convince yourself to make the big steps.
Always have those big steps in mind and plan all the way to the end but don't jump in the river before you've learned how to swim.
Always have those big steps in mind and plan all the way to the end but don't jump in the river before you've learned how to swim.
1. Prioritize your big rocks
You may have been expecting Big Rocks to show up again. I won't say it works for me and you should try it and see if it works for you. No, this is not a tip or a recommendation, this is an absolute requirement.
If you want to improve your life in any way, you need to sort out your priorities and always work on them first. Nothing is more important and nothing should be more important to you than your Big Rocks. They should define who you are and what you believe in. You must never compromise in that.
If you want to improve your life in any way, you need to sort out your priorities and always work on them first. Nothing is more important and nothing should be more important to you than your Big Rocks. They should define who you are and what you believe in. You must never compromise in that.
If you want to feel accomplished every day you must work on your Big Rocks before you do anything else. You won't have time for the things you love otherwise.
I know this post was rather long today, but I could never be more thankful to all my readers who are really making my dream of becoming a writer come true by taking the time to read my work and discuss my ideas with me.
I'm interested in hearing from you, what kind of scheduling do you do, how does it affect your personal life? Are you struggling with keeping everything in order? How do you handle your distractions? You can comment below or message me.
I'm interested in hearing from you, what kind of scheduling do you do, how does it affect your personal life? Are you struggling with keeping everything in order? How do you handle your distractions? You can comment below or message me.
Also I hope you enjoy the fireworks tonight if you're in the US!
Good luck!
Love,
-Alexander
No comments:
Post a Comment